Singin' in the Rain meets Hollywood Babylon! On a farm in Walnut, Iowa, Ellie Ash aspires to screen immortality. Hollywood-bound screenwriter Elmo Green rides by on his bicycle and is immediately smitten with Ellie, who joins him on his journey west. Soon after they arrive, Ellie and Elmo work with a wild array of characters incredibly reminiscent of Ethel Merman, Gene Kelly, Mario Lanza, and Joan Crawford. Ellie quickly becomes America’s Sweetheart as the "Girl of a Thousand Sounds," but when a gossip columnist exposes a few dirty little secrets, Ellie has to claw her way back to the top before the new "it" girl takes her spot.
The Story
Act I
On a 1930s Hollywood back lot, Adele DeRale, the creator of the Tales of Tinseltown, a fan magazine that covers Hollywood gossip, tells about reporting the latest scandals (The Public Wants to Know).
Across the country, on an Iowa farm, Elinor Hinkelberry, is reading the latest copy of Tales in Tinseltown, as she dreams of being a famous Hollywood actress. She considers changing her name for the screen to “Ellie Ash” and makes her way to stardom (I Belong in Hollywood). A young man named Elmo rides up on his bicycle. He is a screenwriter on his way to meet his uncle, a famous movie producer. Ellie hops on the bike with Elmo and they depart for Tinseltown (Lets’ Go).
When the two arrive in California, they are led on a tour of the famous N.G.N. Productions lot (N.G.N. Productions). Elmo’s uncle, Norman G. Neinstien, enters in an argument with one of his stars, Lulu Beauveen. Lulu is obviously under the influence, bickering at Norman to let her do a movie-musical. Elmo, seeing the opportunity, chimes in and offers to write it (The Musical Showdown).
The next day, screen tests for Elmo’s new jungle themed movie-musical begin. They are looking at thousands of actors for the roles but Elmo keeps urging his uncle to see Ellie. Several actors strut their stuff and get cast (Someone to Love Me), (I Can Sing), (All Over the Place). Eventually Ellie jumps in, does a duet, and gets a part (All I Dreamed).
The next day, Elmo is surprised to see that his uncle has changed and misinterpreted his script. Lulu shows up to the jungle set inebriated and the company begins shooting (The Jungle Song).
Ellie flirts with Norman and lands her own movie, which Elmo must write quickly (So This Is the Movies). Adele is now reading off the flashing headlines: “New star Ellie Ash has taken Hollywood by storm, starring in films written by Elmo Green.” We see Ellie play multiple roles in several films (Sounds in the Night), (Keep in Step). Then Elmo writes an adaptation of Victor Hugo’s The Hunchback of Notre Dame in which Ellie gets to play Esmeralda (Hunchy).
When they begin to shoot a new movie, Ellie arrives on set to perform a number and, upon finishing, vomits in a water pail (It’s Mine). Adele picks up on her symptoms and realizes she is pregnant. All of the men wonder if it could be theirs. Elmo, furious and heartbroken, quits his work at the studio and storms off. Adele threatens to print the scandal and Ellie slaps her, sealing her fate.
Act II
Adele is getting lots of dirt on the recent scandal (Tell Me Please). Elmo comforts Ellie, who is dismayed over the recent events. He suggests that Ellie disguise herself and take a screen test at Weevil Productions, the new company that Elmo has been writing for.
She is up for a role to be a lust filled floozy. She gives it her best shot, pretending to act like Lulu (Born to Be Bad). Meanwhile, Norman is trying to clean the image of his company. He is shooting a movie staring Lulu as a young nun in college, who piously cheers the football team on to victory (You’ve Got to Be Good).
While both movies are filming, an earthquake hits! Ellie runs to save the animals that Weevil keeps on set. She saves most of the animals but is trampled by a stampede of cattle and rushed to Hollywood Hospital.
Adele prepares to go to the hospital in disguise to get the scoop (My Best False Face). Elmo attests his devotion for Ellie and proposes (I’ll Stand by You), but Ellie’s friends visit and interrupt the romance (For My Career). She ends up being carried away, leaving Elmo alone in dismay.
Ellie is preparing for her next roll when she runs into Elmo packing his belongings. She is shaken by his departure and is unsure if she can perform. Lulu, taking advantage of the situation, offers Ellie drugs, which she wearily accepts. Ellie goes on to do her part brilliantly (Stars in My Eyes). After it’s revealed that Lulu drugged her, chaos ensues and revealed secrets lead to an absurdist ending: Ellie and Elmo are reunited at the "Hollywoodland" sign where each plans to jump. They decide, instead, to cast aside Tinseltown and bike off into the sunset—expecting happier times in New York on Broadway (Finale).
Act I
Act II
The Public Wants To Know
Tell Me Please
I Belong In Hollywood
Born To Be Bad
Let's Go
You've Got To Be Good
N.G.N. Productions
My Best False Face
The Musical Showdown
I'll Stand By You
Someone To Love Me
For My Career
I Can Sing
Stars In My Eyes
All Over The Place
Broken Promise Land
All I Dreamed
Finale
The Jungle Song
So This Is The Movies
Sounds In The Night
Keep In Step
Hunchy
It's Mine
"Damn near perfect! While Broadway bemoans the fact that 'there just aren't any new musicals that will run forever and make millions for everyone involved,' composer Paul Katz and librettist Michael Colby have come up with what could be the new Fantasticks, Dames at Sea or other long-running, money-making, mega-hit. A musical extravaganza!" –Back Stage
"Delicious satire! An ambitious pure Hollywood musical. Numbers that are laughter from the first syllable to the last." –The New York Times
"Popcorny fun! An off-Broadway bonanza of a musical. This stylish Hollywood satire is the biggest little spectacle south of 42nd Street. The fable is familiar, but the score soars and the cast is like all the stars at MGM rolled into eight talented crazies who put the move in movies and the sin in cinema!" –Host Magazine
"A brilliant send-up of Hollywood films of the 30s, complete with plot twists and stereotypical characters without becoming trite or predictable. This is an off-off-Broadway show with a Broadway feel." –Miami Weekly News
"Delightfully entertaining! Hilariously outrageous! What a rare and refreshing show. A cross between Babes in Arms and Day of the Locusts." –The San Diego Union-Tribune
"Pure gold! Sparkling new tuner may be the 'singingest, dancingest, most toe-tapping' musical since 42nd Street. A melodic score. Funny, nostalgic, and slightly campy lyrics. A sturdy, traditional musical worthy of a Broadway venue." –Theatregoer
"Musical on its way to becoming a hit! Uniquely inventive, highly impressive." –Parlee
"Exciting, spellbinding scenes. Numbers that are not only technically accomplished, but bubble with vitality which puts to shame the similarly spectacular but essentially cold-blooded, glossily self-conscious show-stoppers of such Broadway hits as 42nd Street. An upbeat evening of musical entertainment." –Westchester Spotlight Magazine
Cast
4 Women, 4 Men
ELLIE ASH – Female, 18-25. Pretty, petite ingenue. Soprano with sexy naivete. Alice Faye/Doris Day/Betty Hutton type with star quality. Amorally ambitious. Must do animal imitations and other sound effects.
ELMO GREEN – Male, 25-30. Jewish young Jimmy Stewart or Tom Hanks type. High baritone. Idealistic screen-writer. Loyal with lofty goals. Faces disappointment and disillusionment but perseveres.
ADELE DeRALE – Female, 35-45. Manic, antic gossip columnist. Mezzo-soprano. Constantly in disguise, a chameleon combination of Tracy Ullman and Helen Hayes. Lovably dangerous and power-hungry.
NORMAN G. NEINSTEIN – Male, 40-50. Tyrannical film producer. Baritone-bass. Blustery and short, a combination of Erich von Stroheim and Mel Brooks (or a faux sophisticate like Peter Sellars). Doubles as farmhand CLYDE.
LULU BEAUVEEN – Female, 25-35. Temperamental film vamp. Eccentric-voiced mezzo. Voluptuous, crafty, and fiendishly determined to do musicals. A drug-glazed cross between Joan Crawford and Jean Harlow. Sanctimonious despite her sinful ways.
DANNY BURKE – Male, 25-35. Great acrobatic dancer. High baritone with slick, slightly sleazy Gene Kelly style. A lady’s man. Kinetic and amorous. Doubles as farmhand CLEM.
BERTHA POWELL – Female, 25-35. Brassy Broadway broad transplanted to Hollywood. Alto with Merman-like high belt to strong E-flat. Can make walls shake with her voice. Coarsely attractive, hard-boiled with a soft spot.
TONY TOSCANINI – Male, 25-35. A hulky blob from Flushing, who is transformed into a handsome heartthrob. Resonant, operatic tenor voice with a floridity and strong A-flat. A Mario Lanza type. Doubles as farmhand LEM.
Some performers double as TOURISTS.
Setting
Tinseltown. All locales can be suggested using a unit set.
Running Time
2 Acts, Approx. 150 minutes
About the Authors
Michael Colby (Book and Lyrics) is the librettist/lyricist of such musicals as Charlotte Sweet (Drama Desk Award nomination), Tales of Tinseltown (numerous productions), North Atlantic (Show Business Award), Delphi or Bust (Amas Musical Theatre), Ludlow Ladd (various regional productions), The Human Heart (Billy Rose Foundation grant; Marymount Community College, NY), Slay It with Music (off-Broadway and London), They Chose Me! (Tada!), and Mrs. McThing (Goodspeed at Chester). Michael was chief writer for The New Amsterdam Theatre Company (at Town Hall, NY), the forerunner of Encores in presenting musicals in concert. He has written for The Theatre by the Blind, The NY Festival of Song, The 92nd Street Y, and numerous benefits. Among the personalities for whom Colby has written are: Angela Lansbury, Linda Lavin, Michael Feinstein, Tony Randall, Savion Glover, Cicely Tyson, Ben Vereen, Susan Stroman, Ron Raines, Cliff Robertson, Jack Gilford, Paul Shaffer, Lainie Kazan, Jane Powell, and Julie Wilson. Recent projects include: They Changed Broadway (a revue about Broadway Jewish talents) and lyrics for Boynton Beach Club (Park Vista Theatre, FL) and Meester Amerika (cited by NJ Star Ledger as "Best Original Score of the New Jersey season"). Mr. Colby is a member of BMI and the Dramatists Guild. For more information, visit: www.michaelcolby.com
Paul Katz (Composer) has worn many hats in the performing world, including pianist, singer, actor, teacher, as well as record and event producer. Not only was he under contract as an actor on Another World (NBC), he wrote songs that were featured on the show. Among his musicals, seen nationwide, are Tales of Tinseltown, Slay It with Music (NYC/London), Dirty Dreams of a Clean Cut Kid (Cable Car Award: Outstanding Achievement in Theater, Jefferson Awards for the run at the Bailywick Theater in Chicago). He was featured singer/performer/arranger for We'll Meet Again (45th Street Theater, York Theater). He musical directed The Night of 75 Stars at the John Drew Theater (East Hampton, Long Island) where he dueted with Richard Adler (songwriter of Damn Yankees, Pajama Game). He recently returned to musical direct Guild Hall's All Star 80th Birthday Gala. For over ten years, he was a much-sought singer/performer at Tavern on the Green, alone and with his trio, and has headlined many other society functions. Paul is proud to be an Honorary Committee member of the Fred and Adele Astaire Awards. Mr. Katz has a busy vocal studio populated by theatrical and recording clients, is on the adjunct Voice Faculty at Marymount Manhattan College (NYC), and is also Head of Vocal Instruction at Coupe Dance Studio Theater in Nanuet, NY. He has garnered many grants and awards, including the Backstage Bistro Award for This Life: The Songs of Portia Nelson.
Royalties
Performance Royalties are based on theater particulars. Please fill out a production application for your personalized quote.
Materials
No deposit, no return! All rehearsal materials you receive are brand-new. Materials are provided on unbound three-hole-punched paper. Mark them up to your heart's desire—we don't want 'em back!
Orchestrations
Piano
Keyboard 2
Bass
Guitar
Percussion
Percussion 2
Production Resources
ROCS Show|Ready - Coming Soon - Click Here for more info.
Rehearsal tracks to help actors learn their vocal parts on the road, at home, or at the rehearsal hall with ease!
ROCS Stage|Tracks - Coming Soon - Click Here for more info.
Professional grade orchestral tracks for your show! Performed and recorded by world-class musicians, these tracks will make you believe you've got live musicians in the theater!
ROCS Fill|Harmonic - Coming Soon
Put the power of a full-size philharmonic orchestra into any space with ROCS premier real-time performance enhancement system!
Logo/PR Package
Includes high-resolution logo artwork, a ready-made show poster, a press packet with pull quotes and reviews, and reference photos to inform your design.